The Silver Linings Playbook Chapter 19

Sister Sailor-MouthIm at the watch glass Lake Diner with Tiffany were in the same booth as last time, ingest our single-serving box of raisin bran, drinking hot tea. We did not say anything on the locomote here we did not say anything when we were waiting for our waiter to bring the milk, bowl, and box. Im beginning to understand that we have the type of friendship that does not require many words.As I watch her spoon the brown flakes and sug atomic number 18d raisins into her bump lips, I try to decide whether I requirement to report her well-nigh what happened at the Eagles game.For two days now I have been cerebration about that little kid crying, hiding behind his fathers leg, and I ascertain so guilty about hitting the big Giants fan. I did not tell my mom, because the news would have garbled her. My father has not talked to me since the Eagles bewildered to the Giants, and I dont see Dr. Cliff until Friday. Plus, Im starting to think Tiffany is the only one and only (a) who might understand, since she seems to have a similar problem and is always exploding, resembling on the beach when Veronica slipped and mentioned Tiffanys therapist in front of me.I look at Tiffany, who is academic term slouched, both elbows on the table. Shes wearing a black shirt that makes her hair look in time blacker. She has on excessively much makeup, as usual. She looks sad. She looks angry. She looks different from everyone else I know she cannot drift on that happy face others wear when they know they are being watched. She doesnt put on a face for me, which makes me trust her somehow.Suddenly Tiffany looks up, regards into my eyes. Youre not eating.Im sorry, I say, and look down at the gold sparkles in the tables plastic coating. tidy sum will think Im a hog if they see me eating firearm you watch.So I dip my spoon into the bowl, drip milk onto the glistering table, and shovel a small mound of milk-soaked raisin bran into my mouth.I chew.I sw abandon.Tif fany nods and thus looks out the window again.Something bad happened at the Eagles game, I say, and then offer I hadnt.I dont want to hear about football. Tiffany sighs. I abhor football.This really isnt about football.She continues to stare out the window.I look and back up that there are only parked cars out human face, nothing of interest. And then I am talking I hit a man so hard lifting him up off the backcloth even I apprehension I maybe killed him.She looks at me. Tiffany squints and sort of smiles, like she might even laugh. Well, did you?Did I what?Kill the man.No. No, I didnt. I knocked him out, precisely he eventually woke up.Should you have killed him? Tiffany asks.I dont know. I am amazed by her question. I mean, no Of course not.Then why did you hit him so hard?He threw my brother down to the concrete, and my mind in force(p) exploded. It was like I left my body and my body was doing something I did not want to do. And I havent really talked about this with a nyone and I was hoping you might want to get wind to me so that I could Why did the man throw your brother to the ground?I tell her the whole story start to finish permit her know I cant get the big guys son out of my mind. Im pacify beholding the little guy hiding behind his fathers leg Im seeing the little guy crying, sobbing, so obviously afraid. I also tell her about my dream the one where Nikki comforts the Giants fan.When I finish the story, Tiffany says, So?So? So I dont get why youre so fray?For a second I think she might be kidding me, but Tiffanys face does not crack.Im upset because I know Nikki will be mad at me when I tell her what happened. I am upset because I disappointed myself, and apart time will surely be extended now because God will want to protect Nikki until I learn to control myself better, and like Jesus, Nikki is a pacifist, which is the reason she did not like me going to the rowdy Eagles games in the first place, and I dont want to be sent back to the bad place, and God, I miss Nikki so much, it hurts so bad and jazz Nikki, Tiffany says, and then slips another spoonful of raisin bran into her mouth.I stare at her.She chews nonchalantly.She swallows.Excuse me? I say.The Giants fan sounds like a marrow prick, as do your brother and your friend Scott. You didnt start the fight. You only defended yourself. And if Nikki cant bay window with that, if Nikki wont support you when you are feeling down, then I say mate her.Dont you ever talk about my wife like that, I say, earshot the sharp anger in my voice.Tiffany rolls her eyes at me.I wont allow any of my friends to talk about my wife like that.Your wife, huh? Tiffany says.Yes. My wife, Nikki.You mean your wife, Nikki, who devoted you while you were recovering in a mental institution. Why isnt your wife, Nikki, sitting here with you properly now, Pat? Think about it. Why are you eating fucking raisin bran with me? All you ever think about is winning Nikki, and yet your p recious Nikki doesnt seem to think about you at all. Where is she? Whats Nikki doing right now? Do you really believe shes thinking about you?Im as well as shocked to speak.Fuck Nikki, Pat. Fuck her FUCK NIKKI Tiffany slaps her palms against the table, making the bowl of raisin bran jump. exit her. Shes gone. Dont you see that?Our server comes over to the table. She puts her dedicates on her hips. She presses her lips together. She looks at me. She looks at Tiffany. Hey, sister sailor-mouth, the server says.When I look almost, the other customers are looking at at my foulmouthed friend.This isnt a bar, okay?Tiffany looks at the server she shakes her head. You know what? Fuck you too, Tiffany says, and then she is striding across the diner and out the door.Im just doin my job, says the server. JeezIm sorry, I say, and hand the server all the money I have the twenty-dollar bill my fix gave me when I said I wanted to take Tiffany out for raisin bran. I asked for two twenties, bu t Mom said I couldnt give the server forty dollars when the meal only costs five, even after I told Mom about overtipping, which I learned from Nikki, as you already know.The hold back says, Thanks, pal. But you better go after your girlfriend.Shes not my girlfriend, I say. Shes just a friend.Whatever.Tiffany is not outside of the diner.I look down the avenue and see her running away from me.When I catch up to her, I ask whats wrong.She doesnt answer she keeps running.At a quick pace, we jog side by side back into Collingswood, all the way to her parents house, and then Tiffany runs around to the back door without saying goodbye.